From Progressive Review.
I got a pre-declined credit card application in the mail.
African television stations are now showing ‘Sponsor an American Child’ commercials.
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
I saw a Mormon polygamist with only one wife.
I bought a toaster oven. My free gift with the purchase was a bank.
If the bank returns your check marked “Insufficient Funds,” you must call them and ask if they meant you or them.
Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children’s names.
A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico .
Motel Six won’t leave the light on anymore.
A picture is now only worth 200 words.
I was so depressed last night thinking about Obamanomics, Obamacare, taxes,unemployment, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, the wars, etc., I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.